Dungeons and Dragons: A Drunken Rant!

Its been a while since I last posted anything. This is mostly about 5e D&D.

Fuck you Tolkienesque races! While I know they are iconic to D&D, I'm not obligated to run a Middle Earth setting, nor am I obligated to have them in my setting. Also, holy hell! Every new fantasy RPG have some flavor of Elf, Dwarf and Halfling, and worst have a ton of variation of them. Each and everyone of one of them are one bland stereotype after another! If your setting has five or more versions of "Elf" (or equivalent) your setting... is... shit!

Tonally, my fantasy setting are a mix of Conan- and Elric-styled Sword & Sorcery with Sword & Saddles, so humans are predominant. Non-human people are rare and are generally alien in thinking. The one exception I make are dark elves. Namely, a Drow-like race modeled on Elric of Melniboné. A degenerate race of pale, amoral sorcerers and slavers who once controlled the world but are now dying off. But don’t call them "elves" as they are not fay. Gnomes are small rock-people. Dwarves, elves and fairies are of old folklore and are scary, amoral supernatural freaks of nature.

Fuck you Paladin! You white-knight motherfucker! I never liked alignment and you are inescapably tied to it! The only good thing Wizards did with you is brake you from your Lawful Good restriction. But I never liked you! The way you have to be moralistic ALL THE FUCKING TIME! I hate your divine power of abject goodytwoshoeness! Fuck, I remember when you could not get ANY disease. Could you even shit back in the 2e era? Did you fart lavender? If your 'lay-on-hand' could heal wounds, what would a healing handjob do? I have no time to fuck around with your Born Again bullshit! I would not mind you so much back in the 3e day, but you were a core class. There is a problem with that: You were meant to be a 'sub-class' of Fighter. Well, more like an enchanted Fighter with a lot of powerful options with the restrictions that comes with it. If you fail to live up to your mile-high standards, you loose your abilities and become a basic-bitch Fighter, and must redeem yourself to become a Paladin again. If anything, you should have been a Prestige Class of fighter. That is, you must work for it and work to keep it!

But still, you were never a tonal-fit for my settings. Fuck your Camelot bullshit! Fuck off!

Fuck you Ranger! You never made sense. What the fuck are you? When I think "Ranger", I think of a rugged frontiersmen like Daniel Boone or David Crockett, or a feral child like Tarzan or Dar from The Beastmaster. So where do all the spell-casting comes from? Is there a Wizarding School in the jungle? "Me Tarzan of House Muffleduff." Fuck that noise! Also, why are Rangers so much better at survival than Barbarians? Barbarians are native people deeply connected to the untamed land they families hailed from. Rangers (the non-feral types) are colonizers from civilized stock. What white-savor bullshit is this?

I have no issue with Rangers being in the game, but they need to be a Fighter archetype with scaled down abilities, they get no animal companion, and THEY CANNOT CAST SPELLS!

Fuck you Barbarian! No wait. You are not a Barbarian: You are a fucking Berserker! All you can do is scream and murder shit with a big-ass axe. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love to murder shit with a big-ass axe. My crawlspaces are a testament to this pastime. My issue with the "Barbarian" Berserker class is that is you ONLY fucking option! Natural survivalist? No, that is for colonists. Having a cool animal side companion like in a Frank Frazetta painting? No, that is also for the colonists. The ability to kick ass without a big-ass axe? Ask the DM if feats are used and take Tavern Brawler, if not, you are usless without a weapon like a basic-bitch Fighter. Can I use raw animal magnetism on those I want to fuck? Wait what? You know, the ability to use Strength for Charisma tests based on physical sex-appeal? HA-HA-HA-HA... no, you silly fuckboy! Do I get any good archetypes? Fuck no! Can I do anything beyond Rage? NO, you fucking dipshit! That is all you can do! You are a fucking hammer and EVERY MOTHER-FUCKER AROUND YOU IS A FUCKING NAIL!!!

My Barbarian is a masterful brawler and survivalist. While they can do a lot of damage with a big-ass axe, they are not formally trained in weapon combat, so they relay on improvised combat. They deadly with anything they can get their hands on, be it with a crude wooden club, a bar stool or some rando's body. Berserker is a class option, but so is Beastmaster.

Fuck off Cleric! I don’t need you. You don’t mach the tone of my setting.

I rather use Magic-Users in your place. "Behold! I'm a Priest of the Pit Lord. I'm a Cleric, but mechanically, I'm a Wizard with the same list of spells! I will summon the guard as I'm not good at fighting and only have a fancy staff to defend myself with."

Fuck you Vancian spell-casting! I mean, Dying Earth is a fine novel, but I don’t want to base the magic of my settings on this. I rather roll to see if one could cast a spell. I prefer magic to be tonally eerie and lacking in utility. Magic missile, shield or floating disc? Nope. Read minds or know alignment? Nope. Powerful-but-dangerous demon-bound-sword in place of generic magical +X sword? Yes! More of this, please. Nasty curses, corpse-fucking necromancy, the summoning and wording of demons and spirits, haruspicy, drawn out rituals, transformation on the level of An American Werewolf in London, catastrophic miss-casting that results in wide-spread disaster, wizards that come off like serial killers? OH... HELL... YEAH!!! fap fap fap fap fap

Fuck you Bard! You don’t need to be the only social-focused class! While I have no issue that you need to seduce every dragon you encounter (any jackass can do it; see Shrek), you don't have to monopolize the act of putting your dick into anything, or anyone! Speaking of which...

I do like the option of having a specialized from of Rogue that is Charisma-based, and with skilled tied to seduction, manipulation and prestidigitation. Over the years I have see names like Houri, Courtesan, Temptress/Tempters, Charlatan and Mountebank, but they all play the same, and they need not be exclusively gendered. The best ones have a "secret art", such a spycraft, court politics or witchcraft. Yes, they fuck their way to success and play dangerous games with powerful people but this is the sort of Games of Thrones bullshit that I really like!

I do like Bards, but I want to take them beyond a simple Troubadour or Skald. I have seen a class from Crimson Blades II called the Griot with a number of cool features, like the King's Ear and the use of witchcraft to secretly "supplement" their knowledge-gathering.

Fuck off Monks! I don’t need you! Or at least, not the Shaolin Kung-Fu Monks. D&D is SOOOO focused on armed combat, they don’t know how to make characters kick-ass without weapons and armor! Its the same issue I have with the Barbarian. Imagine an acrobatic-fighter parkouring their way around the battleground, dodging blows and tripping-up fighters. That is the kinetic action I want to see in D&D combat, but I don’t care about Shaolin Monks as there are a lot of spirituality tied to this archetype that I don’t want to get players bogged down with. More over, beyond personal goals, characters need materialism as a default driving force for adventure.

One thing I have been working on is a class of acrobatic-fighter who are former slaves who use dance and acrobatics to hide their combat training in order to revolt. Without a cruel masters to fight, they are free-agents trying to make a living or find a new cause to fight for.

Fuck you Warlocks! I actually like you, but I'm on a fucking roll. If I can change one thing about you, it to make you less optimized towards Eldritch Blast.

And finally...

Fuck you janky-ass combat system! As you gain level, on top of gaining new class abilities, you take more damage, can hit better and can better avoid unusual effects though saves. But at the same time, your damage output and ability to avoid mundane attacks remains the same unless you get some feat or class feature. Fuck that noise! The static damage thing is a long standing thing. What is the point of Hit Dice if they are not used for the amount of dice you rolling combat? Imagine who quickly combat would be if a 9th level Fighter can take down an adult green dragon with 9d8 of a sword attack! Imagine that vary Fighter forgoing bulky-ass metal armor for a sexy chainmail bikini or metal cod piece due to high Dex and dodge bonuses!

Oh wait! You are that pedantic fuck who like to go online and bitch about how unrealistic "boob-plate" is or why Dragonborn women should not have big fat mommy-milkers! FUCK YOU! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY TABLE! I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN AND YOU ARE A FUCKING JOYKILL!!!

These Colors Run Dead

There is a style of flag in the U.S. that is pattered on the American flag, but is entirely black and while save to a blue band running in the middle were it should be white. A more extreme variant has it in a Punisher skull (like in the Marvel comics). This flag is called the "Blue Lives Matter" flag to most, and "The Thin Blue Line" flag to those who wave it. The idea is that the "thin blue line" is the barrier between "Order" (good, law-abiding citizens) and "Chaos" (deviant criminals and anarchists) and that law enforcement protects "Order" from "Chaos". But that is bullshit!

For one, law enforcement is the "Order"! They are its agents of enforcement. And for another, freedom — true freedom; the type Conservatives clam they want and Libertarians are more honest about — is inherently chaotic. More over, the Punisher skull variant undermines this, as it is naked display authority without justice. Cops who spot this would be less subtle with a Judge Dredd badge or if they pack Dirty Harry's Smith & Wesson .44 Magnum like they want the world to know that they are packing a baby-dick. Law enforcement idealizing a psycho who'll shoot a jaywalker is comically on the nose.

What that flag is about is just fascism, plan is simple. It is about the police-state. It is about subjugation of "The Other". It is about enabling corruption by those in power. It is about maintaining a system even when it is broken. It is the banner of the Evil Empire!

There is a reason why people are risking COVID-19 in protest. There is a reason why the burning of the Third Precinct police station in Minneapolis was a good thing. For too long, the police suffer from the "If Your Only Tool Is a Hammer Then Every Problem Looks Like a Nail" dilemma with their training. They are too reliant on firearm training and lack de-escalation skills. Are are also no better than a gang. The police culture — an informal wall of silence among members of law enforcement — is more in keeping to frat boys and organized crime, which puts the welfare of the so-called "bad apples" above any semblance of justice, with "bad apples" being a comical euphemism used by police agencies to dismiss individuals who were caught, despite them being the products of law enforcement training (no to mention the fact that the full statement is "one bad apple spoils the whole bunch", which is appropriate but always with a dumb sense of irony).

I grew-up knowing how useless the police are when you live in a "red-lined" neighborhood. I grew-up seeing how the police behave when they think know one is looking. I grew-up knowing the actions law enforcement takes when someone crosses them. I grew-up knowing that the wife and kids of a cop have no were to turn to if they are abused by him, nor can they ever escape. I grew-up hearing that the legal system dont give a damn about rape-victims how cops who rape can just get away with it. And due to all that, I grew-up with not respect for authority or the system.

Until they get their shit together the social contract is broken. Their badge — their authority — is meaningless. The scale and the gavel is broken. People should see them no better than another street gang (black people been doing that forever) and we should fight to keep our streets safe. This is nothing new in the US. In the '60s, The Black Panther Moment formed to deal with racist cops. People forget that the most successful insurrection in the United States was the Battle of Athens in 1946, and that involved a shootout with over two-hundred Sharif Deputies (who were in a prison house rigging a local election) loosing to scores of armed WWII veterans. (I don't think gun-rights activists ever bring this event up, ever. Even though is about good-guys-with-guns fighting tyranny and winning. Its like they don't want to alienate their blue-lives supporters.) I'm not saying that people should embrace mindless mayhem and lawlessness, nor am I saying that we should kill cops (I mean, outside of self-defense). No, we can do better! If there is going to be stability, there needs to be accountability as well as better methods of peacekeeping, and the only way to get there is to dismantle the system and makes something better, even it its from the ground-up.

 

Until then...

 

Toilet Paper Shortage

Things would be way better if more folks knew how to use these properly:

That is all. Go about your business of being stuck at home.

Oh Zak...

Picture of Zak S., aka Zak Smith, aka Zak Sabbeth, aka Zak Shitbag.

I just found out about this today.

Why am I not suppressed?

For those not in the know, epic-level shit-starter Zak "S" Smith of Playing D&D with Porn Stars Blog and I Hit It With My Axe v-blog was just #MeToo-ed at the beginning of the week. In a nutshell, his ex-girlfriends -- Mandy, Jennifer, and Hannah and Vivka -- came foward to tell the world about his menially, emotionally and sexually abusive behavior towards them.

You can read it here.

I read their posts. I have no doubts about the honesty of the women that came forward. What they said about him is too specific and are the types of things people seldom think of when it comes to abuse. He is a narcissistic ass who treats people like shit and then looses his shit when people throw this shit right back at him. I recognize the patters, and I have known too many assholes like that!

Years ago, I used to follow his blog, and it had some good stuff on it. Some time after, I noticed how toxic he is, and they way he overreacts to anyone who disagrees with him. I hate the term "SJW" and I considered people threw that term around (along with "cuck" and "NPC" -- outside RPGs and video games) to be self-deluded shit-heels, but Zak acts as the poster boy of what Alt-Right wankers call "SJWs". Although, in Zak's case, he does not care about anyone else to really care about the equality of others, especially women. Much like a rich prick who throws a million to charity and a further 2-million to make sure the while world knows it, Zak puts on the badge of "social inclusiveness" to make himself look good.

While there are going to be apologists who will take his side, they can kiss my ass, along with those asshats who would start a campaign of threats and harassment on the woman... well they can choke on my dick! Well, people are dropping him left and right like the burning bag of shit that he is. His ability to find sites to publish his stuff is now limited. He is already banned from a number of forums (to be fair, he was already banned from many sides for being such a toxic person).

I wish to thank the woman for being brave enough to speak out about him, as the internet gets really nasty with women who do so. That kind of added abuse should also not be tolerated. I wish the women well and godspeed.

The Potential of HeroMachine 3

Not not long ago, I made a pic to highlight the capabilities of the HeroMachine 3 app, based on a set of videos by this guy. There are limits on what you can do on HeroMachine 2, but with HM3, you can do a lot more. Even with the wider options, HM3 is still limited with its features, so people find creative ways to make the most with whats available, and come with novel ways of getting around the limits. One of the most common things is to re-purpose objects into different things by tilting and reshaping them. It is neat what you can do with the fading and transparency of some of the background objects to emulate the effect lighting and shadowing. It is also good to learn how the "masking" feature works, as you can get a lot of neat results form it. Experiment! Dick around! It is a lot of fun!

Not too long ago, I posted the image on this one forum based on D&D and free-speech, but to the chagrin of the founder/administrator — Prespos — the perverts at ProBoards have issue with breasts. They see it as pornography, and if he dose not take action on pics like them, ProBoards would pull the whole site down. I do not fault Prespos for this, as he hates the restrictions more than me, but he wants to keep the site running. ProBoards is run by faggots who would rather make things kosher for the sake of the ad sponsors. Sponsors should not care who they get advertised to, as longs as someone see the ads. Simply put, if I was to run a forum, I would not use them, and for their shameless and draconian policy, I will maintain my AdBlock on all the ProBoards forums I frequent.

OK, enough with that shit, here is this the picture. Basically, it is a slightly drunk sunbather lying on the beach, dressed as God intended... well, as how I'm used to seeing beach-goes dressed, growing-up in the San Fransisco Bay Area. Enjoy!

(click for full-size image)

Who knew such a simple little program can do so much? _\\\

WTF Blogger!?

I got this notice saying that Blogger is cracking down on nudity.

In this case, they making sites privet if they post any nudity. I hate when sites do this. Yes, they want to cut down on the adult content, and I understand that they don't want people to post hardcore, XXX-Rated stuff on it, but this gets iffy as nudity and artistic outlooks are highly subjective.

There is a stigma with nudity in the western world that is perverted into itself, and for reasons that eludes me, is affiliated with sex. Also the obsession with breasts — more specifically nipples — being "obscene" is a weird joke! I do not see topless women as an obscenity, and I see people who do as perverts.

As it is, the Mature Content warning is a huge hassle — for the reader and the editor. When I go to Playing D&D With Porn Stars, I get the disclaimer, but the jump does a number to my browser. When I used the disclaimer for a short time, it was messing up my posts while changing and checking the doodads. I end up stopping it out of frustration! Since my only real "objectionable" post was on chainmail bikinis and armored loincloths, it feels like no big thing. But still, T&A are ALWAYS on the table with this blog.

In my experience, sites that tighten their belts on content only make things worse, and ultimately the administrators turn thuggish if they feel the clients are not complying enough. This is more then just nudity or adult content. This goes with religion, politics, language, criticizing the admins. Amplify this, by the fact that Blogger is own by Goggle — the company with the "Midas Touch" of shitty business decisions! "Don't be evil" my ass!

As far as content go, I will stay the course.

Damn You Yahoo! Damn You to Hell!!!

I just got a massage from a friend that my Yahoo Mail account was hacked (it sent-out a whole lot of letters, beyond my control), but there is no way I can talk with him because the damn thing dont work right! For the past month or so, I can read and receive messages, but I cannot compose them — the rich text is too rich for my system. I figured-out the problem (after some Goggling, I found-out that it cant handle theme-changes), the goddamn "Send" button is grayed-out and useless! Shit, if its not one thing, its another!!! I have spent a good part of the morning figuring things out. (Mostly readings FAQs and Goggling-up Q&A forums)

I *could* get a new e-mail account, but I'm too nested with this account — switching over too much of a hassle. I have NEVER, EVER had problems like this before the automatic upgrade! If I cant resolve this stupid shit, I would be forced to change account.

For months, about a year ago, it would flack me about the upgrade. It says it was better, but when I tried it out, it was shitty, so I swished back. Then one day, it said that they are getting rid of the old system, so the switch was mandatory. The new system only adds a better appearance (a superficial thing at that), and programing is set to Kafkaesque. The options are limited and useless! That seems to be the motto of computer programing: "If it works well, lets make it shitty!"

So if I was really hack, I know not... For all I know, the system is just *that* buggy! So now I wait in limbo, unable to send out letters to anyone, unless I PM them on forums (unfortunately, such a gap is not possible with some).

Other random-ass rants:

• Cuntcast (Comcast Cable) wanted my to pay $90 a month for fucking basic cable! OK, I understand that they need to pay maintenance and wages, but they also promote their services with local ads. Now, how do local TV and radio station pay for their broadcasting when they offer programing for free? Advertisements! So they are making a mint with the normal bills and with ad money. Fuck them! I ended their services, and I enjoyed months of free services -- how is should be! Then they cut me off. I have no TV antenna, so now I have been watching shows an Netflix and Hulu. In the past week, I was given a Roku 2 HD as a belated Christmas gift. I highly recommend the Roku. It has lots of great programs!
• When opening a new tab on my Firefox, AVG (a necessary evil that keeps my system form getting a computerized equivalent of an STD) like to redirect the page to their own search page. This happens a lot and usually when checking out blogs.
• I work on a number Wiki sites, and I post images relevant to the fiction at hand, even if the content is "questionable." Let say you where to add images of characters from the Gods of War video games to the Gods of War Wikia. Well yeah, there are a number of the female characters with their tits out, but when you have a wiki of a setting like that, you should expect content like that... But not high and mighty moralist cunt-monkeys like Sannse! (a Wikia Staffer) They would knockdown images they consider being too risqué, even if it is appropriate to the setting at hand.
• With the last rant, my issue goes beyond their absurd content-control policies. My real issue is why boobs are still an issue? A movie where a guy gets violently hacked apart: "No problem, its is only a PG-13 film." But it also has lady-nipples: "Change it to a solid R-rating!" Nipples are not obscene things. Making them risqué objects only elevates them as highly desirable sex objects! Female legs and navels used to be really risqué, but now its not longer an issue as we have seen them, and me have gone beyond them. If female nipples get over-saturated in our media, they will quickly loose they sexual power. This sense of modestly should be elevated as a national embarrassment! It only shows that we are just a nation of immature 13-year old boys.

WTF Blogger?!?

OK, so I'm checking out my (recently updated) Blogger watch list to check on the blogs of folks I'm watching, and lo and behold, my list is flooded with posts form some "ngoceh" at the Personal Finance Tips blog. What the hell is going on here? I do not have this douche on watch! I do not give a damn about the glorified circle-jerk that goes on between Wallstreet fatcats! And I cant get rid of the posts, and they have flooded my watch list like a cockroach infestation, as the fucker dont shut up!

Damn, I hate these arbitrary updates! >=(

Running for Capital Hell and The Whorehouse

My growing frustration with Washington has reached the boiling point! I found out that Megauplod(dot-com) was busted, and all their equipment seized. Natually, this just happened after the big SOPA protest. With the treasonous National Defense Authorization Act green-lighted by both sides (to me, anyone who sighed-off on that deserves to be detained indefinitely and waterboarded), and how they tried to poss two bills (SOPA and PIPA) that only benefits a few fat-bastards who are as greedy and bloated as themselves (Hollywood, the record inds., big pharmaceuticals, cabal companies, etc.), I am loosing faith in the system. Yes, the old-farts had no clue about the internet, and the people spoke-up to get the bill defeated, but that is not going to stop them form passing another shitty ass bill that would reduce the Constitution to a piece of toilet-paper!

They are all dead to me! >:(

They don't answer to us - the tax-paying people - they only answer to their big corporate suger-daddies! I could say "Get the bums out!", but who would replaces them? We would just get stuck with another bunch of greedy, incompetent assholes! The Teaparty Movement tried to change the Capital by bringing new blood, but they prove to be a bunch of retards and sellouts!

Right now the media is too focused no that political game show I call The Biggest Looser, where a bunch of mega-yuppies compete to show America who is the biggest anti-Christ, and send him to the Whor... er, Whitehorse. (yes, I know "anti-Christ" is a strong term, but I dont see it in terms of that one guy who will become "The Beast", but more on the terms of moral hypocrites like Pat Robertson and Fred Phelps, who call themselves "Christian" but have no clue what Jesus was really about - he was a spiritual rebel, who rejected much of what the Bible had to say). They all follow the Cult of Regen - who's economic policies failed twice already. They put WAY too much trust in big business to do right. They say they what less government, but only one will deliver, but that guy is not content until the US is a Mad Max version of itself, but he thinks we'll get a utopia out of it. They are all fucking jokes!

I know its hard to believe that a crazy-ass like myself would have such a view, but I see things with a balanced approach. Too much government is a grinding and rigged bureaucracy at the vary least, or a police-state at the vary worst. Too little government means no one gets help, and robber-barons fill the power-vacuum. I like a degree of government control, like business regulations, environmental protection, product safety standards, anti-trust laws, political campaign restrictions, building permits, and so on. We dont need a lot of nonsensical nanny-state laws or a draconian legal system, but it needs to be appropriate and maintain a balance of powers. Unfortunately people get a little political and/or economic power, and they loose their heads.

Well I see Governor Walker (WI - R) getting recalled by overwhelming numbers in the TV, and it is giving me such a schadenboner. >=D

Hot Elf Chick Welcomes You to GTFO!

I hate Tolkienesque - more over, dandy little Elves! You what an elf chick, here you are, bitches:

Some of you might say that is not a chick, but I cant tell, but the truth is, that I don't really give a shit! But if you are some wanker who needs his or her Hot Elf Chick fix, then here she is:

Welcome to the world of Elven AIDS, dipshits! Now get the hell out!

Browncoats Rejoice!

W00T!!! Firefly is back on television...

...well, on extended cable. The Science Channel - known for their hard-science programing, narrated by Morgan Freeman, and some middle-aged Japanese professor - has picked-up the long canceled sci-fi western. I could still watch it on Hulu.com, but my vid-quality sucks, and I can't play all the episodes there (one or two of their episodes are damaged or something).

If you can't tell, I really like that show. It was like Joss Whedon read Han Solo at Star's End ten times, with some white-knuckled westerns in between (or something like that). Even if you don't like his other shows - like Buffy or Dollhouse - he is good for dishing out interesting characters, as well as good character developments and interaction. The local environments are colorful, the ship has a nice lived-in feel, lots of moral ambiguity, and it has the sort of western-styled pioneer environment that I like in a good sci-fi.

The FOX network where fools for crushing this show. It was the first meaningful sci-fi program in a long time. They hated it, sabotaged it, and did their damndest to kill it before it could even develop even a small following! It was the sort of "space western" that got me into classic Star Trek and hoped for in Enterprise, and the sort of roguish cast that made Blake's 7 interesting. Star Trek: The Next Generation had a lot of fans - even fans who go as far as to make the show's overarching ideology their personal philosophy - but they can keep their happy-go-lucky future world! It is a universe divorced of our human nature. A culture that enjoys Shakespeare, but could never truly appreciate his works. That is the cheerfully optimistic world I wash my hands of! The FOX network pride themselves for being the "edgy network", but that was a long time ago, and they no longer have the vision or foresight to see 1 inch from them, nor 1 second ahead. Their executives maybe the poster-boys for German-styled eugenics, that ruins anything they touch, but those bastards can't take the sky from me!

Political Wrongness

I have gone on the record by saying the the "4e" game is not D&D, but in a way it is D&D. By "D&D", I don't mean this, but I mean this! You see, back in the 2nd years, T$R was so concerned about the opinions of whores, pinkos, and dogs, they make their line dry and soulless do to strict content control. They even had the nerve to tell players how play their own games with an online document over content control. Folks might say that it was only suggestions for DMs, but folks forget that T$R took to the internet with extreme control and prejudice!

Now, how is WotC like T$R? Simple, part 6 of the Game System License:

Quality and Content Standards: The nature and quality of all Licensed Products will conform to the quality standards set by Wizards, as may be provided from time to time. At a minimum, the Licensed Products will conform to community standards of decency and appropriateness as determined by Wizards in its discretion. Without limiting the foregoing, no Licensed Products will depict in any text, graphical or other manner:
(a) excessively graphic violence or gore;
(b) sexual situations, sexual abuse, pornography, gratuitous nudity of human or humanoid forms, genitalia, or sexual activity; or
(c) existing real-world minorities, nationalities, social castes, religious groups or practices, political preferences, genders, lifestyle preferences, or people with disabilities, as a group inferior to any other group or in a way that promotes disrespect for those groups or practices, or that endorses those groups or practices over another.

On other words, if you what to make a third source book using the 4e rules, then you'll be working with a short leash, because if it seems right for the Hyborian Age (or even the goddamn Bible for that matter. Read it - it has all the sex and violence most "right-mind" Christians scorn when used in other works), then you cant put it into your 4e splatbook! The first two are obvious (and the fan parts), but the last one is the most restrictive, as you cant even put in the normal tropes found in pulp fiction: African bushmen, savage Indians, "yellow peals", Nazis, mongoloids, Bible-thumpers, or any sort of slave or slave-owning people! Hell, you can't even portray bigots, feminists or homosexuals! OK, so no blood-porn and kinky eye-candy art, and no negative portrayals of anyone - w00t, sounds like fun...

FUCK THAT SHIT!!! I am sick of candy-ass settings as much as I hate gratuitous magic-heavy worlds! You might be thinking, how is it good to produce a setting like F.A.T.A.L. that encourages immorality, promiscuity, wanton violence, bigotry, slavery, and negative cultural stereotypes? But the answer is simple: that is D&D at its core!!! Its a game about murderous hobos who brake into the homes of one-sided degenerate folk, so they can butcher them - even their babies - and steal their shit, so they can spend it all on booze, bitches, and magical bling-bling. When you try to downplay these facts, it becomes an awful mess like Conan the Destroyer when it downplayed all the gratuitous aspects that is intrinsic to its own genre. I don't mind the new games being cartoon versions of themselves, but why the hell should they push their diluted world views on independent publishers who what to make a unique and interesting setting under their fancy-ass system? It may seem odd to some that these things are important, or just selfish ideas, but some of the most rich and unique settings in RPG history would have never been able to be published under 2nd edition, or 4e rules. Not just the Hyborian Age, but also Tékumel, Carcosa, and a few others (far too few, in my opinion). Darksun for example, is a world that should never be bound by political correctness, as its a dark world, with morality as broken as their shattered world. For those who believe settings should be child-friendly fairs for their own sake, can all go to Hell!!!

In my games, slavery is not avoided, nor demonized - its just a way of life.

By the way, the old-school RPG blogosphere has been debating the subject of nudity and female portrayals in RPG art. I find this to be a really good thing, as this don't come up much beyond the insipid rambling from the "Pussy Parlor" on the WotC forums, and its good to see people go beyond the "naked slave-girls and chainmail-bikini clad warrior-women are sexiest and stupid" attitude and judge the taste and significances of such art on their own merits. On that note, I would like to take my hat off to Otherworld Miniatures for not just making good minis that look like they have been ripped right out of the old Monster Manual book, but for having the balls to show male genitalia on their miniatures. Don't get me wrong, I don't have an obsession with male genitalia - or monsterus ones for that matter - but its go to see someone present them in a mature and non-obscene way.

Technically, this is "National Geographic nudity".

Retcon or Retarded Continuity

I was watching E.T. the other day and I noticed that all the cops had walkie-talkies in-placed in their hands in an awkward fashion, then I remembered that they originally had guns. My mind could not fathom why Steven Spielberg would make such an edit, then I remembered what George Lucas did with Han Solo on the classic Star Wars movie.

Really, was any of that needed? What is so objectionable about gun-toting cops chasing down a kid smuggling an illegal alien on a bike? (he was obviously a lawbreaker, running from the law) The Solo shoot-out retcon was pure sacrilege, plain and simple! >:(

Then it hit me! What else could they make a shameless edit to? What else...



My thinking is that a gun would appear on the swordsman. The swordsman fires, then Indiana Jones side-steps in an awkward and unnatural fashion. Then Indi takes his shot! :P

There should be a law ageist old-farts reworking their grand opus from their younger, starving days! Lets seen them try to edit-out the police guns, when they dare to brake that law! Muhahahahahahahahah!!! >:D